Lived Experience Forum

[TideisTurning]

Others’ expressions of anger can be really confronting. How could we better respond to the anger of someone else?  @SunnyFlower 

@Patches59- this might speak to what you were interested in 😊

[SunnyFlower]

Others’ expressions of anger can be really confronting. How could we better respond to the anger of someone else?  

We can get a bit lost when we confronted with anger in others. And it’s OK. The important thing to remember is to separate the emotion from the person. We are not we feel or how we act. At least not all the time. You might have heard something along the lines of:” You can’t control what others say or do, but you can control your response” and that is the answer in a nutshell. Try and remember that their anger is very rarely directed at you or caused by you. You can either try and put some space between the angry person and yourself, or if it is a safe option – have an honest conversation about the roots of the anger and where it might be coming from.  

Sometimes, anger can rub off on us, like a contagious illness. It is important to be able to recognise if/when we might be triggered by something another person may have said or done. Therapy is always a great place to figure things out and learn about personal triggers and emotional responses.  

[TideisTurning]

How could someone constructively communicate and/ or safely express anger?  @SunnyFlower  

@Patches59 @Lacey- do either of you have any ideas?

[SunnyFlower]

How could someone constructively communicate and/ or safely express anger?  

As long as you are not hurting yourself or others, consider expressions of anger that work for you on a personal level. Individualise your expression. Sometimes the most beautiful, meaningful and profound creations come out of your expression of inner most personal struggles with difficult emotions. Consider art, music, creative writing, decorating or renovating (can be a physical outlet too). Use a simple tool of body scanning to realise where you hold most tension, where you feel your anger most. Like for example, for most of us, we tend to overthink and get in our heads. When that happens, it might be helpful to take things down, literally, focus on the lower part of your body and do something with our feet, toes – ground yourself.  

[Patches59]

When involves another person, maybe saying that am feeling angry and need time to be alone for awhile

[Patches59]

Write things down.  Write letter to other person saying how feel and then burn it.

going into nature on to a beach and screaming out the anger?

[amber22]

Love those ideas! @Patches59 

[TideisTurning]

That makes sense to take some time away @Patches59. The saying 'if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all' comes to mind in this situation. 

Screaming out the anger in nature could make a cool release! I've known someone who liked screaming at the ocean. 

[Patches59]

In my teen years I used to go to park or empty school yard, yell and scream them go into tears

[SunnyFlower]

@Patches59  great ideas! Thank you for your contribution! If you find it hard finding a quiet place in nature or cant get to nature - screaming into a pillow is also a good alternative 🙂